today i learned the meaning of the word formidable
a word i always read in context and have made meaning out of by the words around it
adjective
1. inspiring fear or respect through being impressively large, powerful, intense, or capable
i got on here to write to you, bc you’re still so far away, bc i have to be back in the office in 30 minutes, bc you haven’t written me back yet, bc it’s now less than 2 months before i will be there, adventure in a foreign country, adventure hands up! my ‘way’, adventure of us in person, finally ~
i can’t believe it’s been four years
there are men, they circle like bats in twilight purple sky first pinpoints light of stars me swatting away at the space
around my head
trying to admire the beauty vast and spreading, above
four years is a big time, a time bigger than the backstory for me of love
four years is a big time, bigger than four bc you were there the first day,
stoned and not able to read in a second language
so soft i lost my heart in a woosh when i leaned over to help you
so soft you
in all my pictures, so soft the coastal hill breath in sea mist you, at the top
of glenneyre i wanted to hold your hand, you it took months for you
to kiss me for us, so soft, that kiss
you, we didn’t speak when you were deported bc it’s real
you, hard, too. hard when you denied my calls or didn’t return my texts
soft as south county, doheny perfect small clean and clear and soft
but for that night i cried there for you, under the wavey ache reflection of moon
there are things about language that i wonder about
there are things you will never know
it has been 7 years now, the time span i use to count cycles
formidable. formidable. adventure. adventure
in the morning and at night it is soft when we say hello or goodbye for now
i am older and so are you and we are both learning. newness,
newness of meanings of things
